The Dreaded Question!

Being blissfully married (apart from the constant bickering with one's spouse) for the past 3 year, I can say that I'm quite happy and content with what I have and will strive for an improved married life insyaallah. Being born and bred in the Asian culture, your married life is never complete without having a child. Um...! Let me rephrase that, "without having children (hell yes its in plural)!

I bet every childless married couple with face the same dreaded question that I face 'WHEN ARE YOU GUYS HAVING A BABY'. I wish I could receive 10 bucks every time I'm  being asked the dreaded question, I would have settled my study loan and maybe even travel around Europe.

To choose to have a child or not to have a child in the Asian context is a very controversial subject and the childless couple will have to answer each and every dreaded question as if one is walking on a tight rope. I will enlighten you with 2 situation that I faced in the past 3 years.

Situation 1.

Friend 1: "oh my god! It's been so long since I have seen you. How's life?"
Me       : "Life's good. Have a dream job (not so much of the dream as it turns out to be). Surviving"
Friend 1: "oh I see, You' ve been married for 2 years? (I nodded my head. Hating this conversation as I know where the topic is headed) So how many kids?"
Me: None yet ( I smiled.)
Friend 1: Oh! (And gave me the sympathetic look that means your miserable). Are you guys trying? Have you guys checked?
Me: Huh! (My blood starts to simmer. I gave a not so genuine laugh) hahahah. Oh well, currently we are going with the flow. If Allah say's its time then its time, but if he says no then it is a no :) (hoping that she will drop the subject) \
Friend: Maybe you should see a gynecologist. Your biological clock is ticking and the older you get the tougher it will be".
Me: *smile* ( Blood boiling to a 100 degree. WT %&* just because you have a baby it makes you an expert! And what makes you think I'm effing infertile?"). *smile*

Situation 2.

Friend 2 : Hey heard you're married! I can't believe its with that guy. I thought you guys weren't serious!
Me : Me too! *laugh jokingly*
Friend 2: Any kids yet?
Me: Going with the flow, but not complaining as I have a lot of responsibility and we are not that stable yet. We'll see, maybe when i reach 30 *smile*
Friend 2: Do not say that! (Gave me the look as if I have mentioned the F word in front of a child) That is too late to have a child and a child is a "rezeki" from Allah. Insyaallah your life will be better once you have a child. You have to work hard if you want a child. Have you seen any gynecologist?
Me : *smile* (hating this holier than thou people. Why only mention Rezeki? Why not mention a child is the greatest Amanah Allah sent down upon you and your spouse and that you will be accountable for all the action she make until she is married or baligh"

So you see, people who ask this dreaded question judge you and your married life by how many children you have. They fail to understand that they are encroaching one's private affair. And the most important thing that they fail to understand that EVERYTHING THAT HAPPEN IN A PERSON LIFE IS BASE ON ALLAH'S WILL "KUN FA YA KUN"! So I may or may not want a child of my own but that is my choice and it is in the will of Allah.

These days if anyone asks me the dreaded question, my answer to them is " Why not ask Allah? He knows best and I am nothing but his humble servant". It shuts most of the people up but the ever persistent one. So do I want a child of my own or not? Well that is none of anyone's business beside me and my spouse.

So for those of you out there who keep asking that kind of question I leave you with 10 reasons why you should just your mouth. The reason are:

1. Its their PRIVACY
2. You will HURT their feeling
3. It is their RIGHT to choose
4. Only Allah can JUDGE
5. WHY do you need to know (for self fulfillment?)
6. You are not going to HELP them to take care of the child
7. You are not going TO GIVE MONEY to help them pay for the child's expenses
8. You are not going to COMMIT your entire life to the child. They are!
9. You are not going to be ACCOUNTABLE for the child's actions. They are!
10. Lastly, it is none of your BUSINESS.

ALIRAN... Whats Aliran?

I first heard the word Aliran was when I was 7 years old  ( if my memory does not fail me) and it was associated with none other than Chandra Muzaffar himself. When my parents spoke about Aliran, the impression they gave was about 40-60 extremely bright and clever old men and women who sits around a table and conspire   plan how to make the world a better place (mind you at the age of 7, my vocabulary is extremely limited so practically the word "conspire" and "intellectual discourse" was extremely hard for me to comprehend). I called them the "dead poet society" of Malaysia. 

When Chandra Muzaffar associates himself with politics, I thought that the "dead poet society" of Malaysia was dead. It never occurs to me that they have survived all this year with their interesting and intellectual writing. It was only logical to me to come up with that very particular assumption was for the very reason that they were extremely infamous and their publication could not be found anywhere. (Hell yes I was wrong for making those assumptions.)

On 7 of September,  I was given the chance by Aliran to participate in a youth workshop . It was an interesting workshop (apart from being lost and late for 1/2 an hour -no thanks to the stupid google map that was pointing to 3 different bloody location). I was extremely uncomfortable during the introductions was for the very fact that most of the participants have such impressive profile with their name. Whoa boy it was so impressive that it makes me look like a nincompoop  and not to mention they are all so young- and here stand a 28 year old girl with an average IQ who has not been reading any intellectual discourse for a very long time ( I guess fantasy and sci-fi novel just doesn't count). I was so insecure with myself that i wish that a hole will appear and swallow me  up to oblivion but i withstand it all and survived. 

So many things were discussed during the workshop it starts of  Multiculturalism in Malaysia. (Amiss the shouting by the whole Kampung Makam on the goal that Malaysians score , I have seriously forgotten about the points that I really want to write about. Damn you football!!!) I believe that there are some sense of insecurities within every race in Malaysia. Me as a person realize and know that racism is wrong. As much as i do not want to be racist, sometime my thinkings and comments can be racist at times. I would not realize it until the damage is done.

I guess it's hard to ingrain in your brain not to be judged on race since your so use to it. i guess old habits die hard. However I will try my best to keep myself in check :)

Some of the youth that joins the workshop have been writing to Aliran for their TA-online where they can write about the issues that concern them as a youth. Here is the link to one of my favorite article "To be Young and Naive". It is such a brilliant article that speak close to the heart. If you want to read more articles by Aliran Exco and writers, do visit their webpage.

You can also show your support and engage with them via Facebook and Twitter.

P/S: Do leave a comment on how gramatical unsound I am so that i can learn from my mistake. Domo Arigato Ne (^_^)

UP and ABOUT

Finally!!! Finally!! Finally!! I Finally have the time and the means to update this blog. Where do i begin hurmm???

Okay after the career setback i face in 2012.. (going to a lot of interview and fail) i have finally entered the NGO world. I am first and foremost thankful to Allah for hearing my prayers and to the NGO for giving me the opportunity to prove myself that I am a loser some claims me to be.There were so many interesting event that took place for the past 4 months I've been there. 

 "Child and Youth Justice Within the Malaysian Legal System" by the Voice of the Children

The first week I joined the NGO, I was given the chance to attend a training called "Child and Youth Justice Within the Malaysian Legal System" by the Voice of the Children for two days. Being a person with zero legal background, my supervisor helped me a lot in explaining the legal terminology that was used in the training. The training open up my eyes to the reality of Malaysian judicial system in Malaysia and how at some point it is a discrimination towards children. It also explained clearly how restorative justice can help a child and the community through healing. Case law were used to discuss on the impact of the sentencing to the child and whether or not it was in the best interest of the child. I've made several new friends and they open up my mind to the endless possibility of what you want to achieve in life as long as you have the passion for it and not to forget to work hard to achieve it.

Victim Court Support.

Another interesting that happened to me was that i was given the chance to follow the social worker and my supervisor to provide support for the victims and their family that are attending the court. First experience was at a Shariah Court, even the case was postponed to another date, I could see the frustration that the victim was feeling as she burst into tears when she had to wait for another month for a hearing. She was and still is a domestic violence victim. As most people should know, the Shariah court proceeding is so damn long-winded that no one with the logical mind could understand why. Has Islam makes it so difficult for a victim to request a divorce from her abuser? (I'll get into this discussion when i have an in-depth knowledge pertaining this matter).

It was later in the month of may  I was yet given another chance to tag along  to a sentencing in a criminal court. It was an Incest+rape case. I awoke early that morning feeling groggy from the lack of sleep i faced and the lack of caffeine entering my brain, wore my most presentable outfit got in the car and sleep(i guess i was to exhausted). Once i reached the court i look over for a place to sit. The benches outside the court was nearly full filled by the public and some lawyers waiting for the court to start. I took a sit beside and elderly man, he reminds me of my dad except that his hair is white and deep in my head i wonder what he is here for, maybe accompanying someone i thought. After 15 minutes of waiting and getting impatience due to the hunger and caffeine withdrawal, i saw the social worker calling me from a far. I raised my brow and wonder whether i got the wrong court. As i reached her, i saw she was flustered and saw that the elderly man was looking towards our direction. "Pasai apa kak TM? Court dah start ka?" i asked her. "Belum lagi. Tak pa kita dok kat sini dulu. Kita tak boleh dok kat sana because the perpetrator is  there." she said. I was quite shocked and i turn over to look at the crowd, no one fits the look of a rapist. "Yang mana satu kak TM. Tak dak sapa pon nampak rupa macam the perpetrator??" I said. "Laaa... you sat beside him." said TM and that shocked me. So that is when i learn the Rape myth buster no 1. A RAPIST LOOK JUST LIKE ANY ORDINARY PEOPLE!!!. Later, he was sentenced to 12 years in jail with no whipping because he was more that 50 years old ( and that is the law in Malaysia)

I will update some of the other events that took place in my next post if it is Allah's will. 

I need to start translating the NGO's court booklet. Dateline given is middle of September. Wish me luck :)

Owh and the NGO is none other than :------

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Life's little... Set back

Life's and its set back... so what's new.. yea .. with less than 2 years of reaching the BIG 30, you can't help but ponder as to what life has to offer . At the most crucial turning my point in my life, I'm suffering from one of the worst setback so far. Life is no longer a roller coaster, but one hell of whirlwind of a never ending cycle of  frustration, anger, sadness.. just to name a few.  With all the craziness that life is offering me right now, I sit back for breather.. pondering and digesting what have I evolve into. Have I become the women I dreamt of being, Have I become the wife that I dreamt of being, and have I become the adult I dreamt of being at this stage in my life.

In April 2012, I read a letter I wrote to myself when I was 18. I realize that I was an idealist back then. As I continue to read the letter, my world-view of life have evolved from an Idealist to a die hard Realist. I guess this is the journey we call life.. All i can say is.. BRING IT ON!!

My motto now days is LILLAHI TAA'LA

Monotonous

                                                   

                                         I am living a monotonous life!

Cleanin out the attics....

Hahaue finally put her foot down on the issue of packing and cleaning up my old stuff... Somehow it doesn't look xciting at all... I lost most of my stuff when Ottosan  accidently burn my box away... But there is somethings left... Firtsly i found my diaries since i was 6..  I had a good laugh at it.. My worldview during those days revolves around magical creatures and cartoons... Honestly... Reading ur old diaries shows how you personally evolve.. From the sniffling ponytailed girl to a hot tempered chatering woman... As i dug deeper into the box.. I found my passion which is writing... I found my first short story at the age of 6... On how i was abducted by aliens... Later i found a chapter on my unfinish romance novel.... And other stories that were scribbled on any paper...  I found and autogaraph parchment of mytown and ash teeth.....

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Wordless wednesday: Pandora box

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The pink Gypsy Caravan.

i wouldn't mind owning this..

Swoosshhhh... Swoossshhh.. there goes the cobweb.. huff.... and pufff.. there goes the dust. Finally, the blog is cleaned and I'm finaly connected to the wondrous world of the internet.

Lately, I have come to acquire the life of a gypsy... i realize somehow i have manage to become a gypsy twice in my lifetime (till now). My childhood dream has been fulfilled. 

The mystical and wonderful life of a gypsy has always fascinated me.. They travel all over the place and lead a carefree life... but trust me being a a Gypsy in this modern world is no longer appealing... you are no longer surrounded by the lush tree's... no longer can you lead a carefree life as everything in this era comes with a price.

The modern life of gypsy, is coined into a newer term.... "Minimalist"... read an article on this a while ago and i don't think this will be a long term phase for me. Mind you, I did not submit to this lifestyle willingly but was force by circumstances, fate and people that you can never trust.. 

It has it pro's and con's but trust me when you can never find a place to call your own... you will forsake the minimalist life and work hard to acquire that space... and that is what I'm trying to achieve now...

I can no longer think straight... wanna hear the ceramah by ustaz kazim... about the HAjj (pilgrimage)... :) owh i'll be contented to own this kind of space.

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dreamy......

beautiful....

i'll be contented with this caravan space..

the gypsy-ness

i loveeee all this caravan

having tea here will be heavenly

Disclaimer on the photo's... got them from Google...

Connected

Life is a whirlwind for the most of us.... Our daily life have been consume with our work and other obligation that we tend to forget to stop and ponder the journey of are life... what has made us become what we are today.

Being married and a career women has led me to the life where i swear i would never allowed myself to lead. I have became selfish and self-centered. I no longer allocated my time to my love ones. The life I lead has always been about me and me only.

During this Barakah month of Ramadan, it came to me one day, that I should take this opportunity to start and mingle back with those people that are dear to my heart. How long has it been since i met and spend time with my cousin 'Pijah Odi' and 'Amai'.. the Rosli's sibling that i shared my childhood with, that have never been apart, we were glued for most of our childhood life enjoying the vast adventure that we had in our 'Kampung'. The magical place for any child to grow up.

It wasn't a  plan meeting... destiny brought us together if i may say so myself. This is how it all started:-

After losing tok bee early this year, i realize that life is to short for me to be a workaholic... I felt guilty at the thought that i never spend much of my quality time with my late grandmother... i have been so engross in my life that i just thought she will be there forever. Due to my guilt and not meeting my other grandma (tok Asmah) for quite a long time... i have decided to spend a week with her.. to strengthen the bond that nearly fade. Tok was living with Hafizah and Akmal so I figured its like killing two birds with one stone :)

So yesterday Hafizah had a gathering with her friends... but they decided to cancel it at the last minute. With her being disappointed and me meeting hasinah over for iftar, we decided that we should go and bukak puasa all of us together.....

When we reach KLCC, told Hafizah that i'm gonna spend time with the books at Kinokuniya and let the happy couple spend some time together. After browsing and contemplating i went to pay for the books, that is when i realize to my horror that i have left my wallet and ave 50 cent only in my bag... and yes it could be considered as one of the most embarrassing moments of my life. Ironically Ash still hasn't arrive with her husband to save me.

So then i call up akmal, wondering whether he'll be coming for the bukak puasa??? and since he now that i have left my wallet he decided to join us.... and save me by bringing my wallet :)

Later after our Maghrib prayers... the 5 of us.. (Akmal and his friend not included sbb dia nak balik smayang terawikh) so off we went to Starbuck to have a cuppa....

And it was then on..... we talked and laugh as we did when we were 8,7, and 5. We laugh and talk... putting aside our differences... there were so many topics that were covered during the session.... From tok som... Cikgu mengaji paling garang "awak ingat lagi tak macam mana tok som nanti bagi kita gan rotan panjang pasai dok gelak masa mengaji" and "awak ingat lagi tak sigheh (sirih) and gigi maih(emas) dia"...

And there was the Market trip conversation "awak ingat tak macam mana anjing oren yang suka hambat kita bila pi markeet dulu (owh org penang kata pasar---markeet)" and "Bangun pagi-pagi buta beli puti kat ama puri" and "awak ingat tak coin purse satu 20 kupang tue"

And there was the conversation on our toys "best gilaa.... guling-guling dalam kotak turut gon (a cemented hilly slope)" "tue la... yang tue kak taty pnya idea" and "awak ingat dak bila paip pecah kat depan rumah rozal and kita nanti pi buat tue macm swimming pool" "laaa awak ingat macm mana kita kna rotan gan mak bila kita terjon dalam kolah"

i'm gonna miss those moment and thank you guys for making my day.  

Akmal and frens

since were all from penang---> we went to have Penang food

Char Kuey Teow was the main dish including prawn me :)

talk till our hearts content with a cuppa

me, Ash and Faikis (her husband)

trying to brainwash Hafizah to become a die hard coffee addict like me... (^-^)

the only guy standing there is hafizah beu... nasi minyak will be sooner than we think.

my obsession at the moment is NAVY  BLUE

From a 10 ringgit shirt..

Ever since i was a kid, i was never the kind of person to be deluded by brands... Yes i love the high end fashion but it was never in my interest to own one... My choice in material things has always been about the quality rather than the brands itself..

There are times in my life when i buy some pieces of expensive clothing.. It was never and impulse buy.. But a full research was done... Will i often wear it??? Is it durable enough??? Is it comfortable??? Then i would sleep on it... If i still dream about having them... Then i would buy them..

Never in my life have i ever used any1 Else's money to buy anything.. My mom thought me that if u wanna own something... U have to work hard for it...then u shall cherish it..

I don't understand why it bugs me so much.. (I'm blaming the bloody weather for being so hot ) some1 just post a comment on one of my post... And ask me how can i afford some of the stuff i have.. Now that is just plain rude don't ya think???

What makes u have the right to say or even to decide what i can afford and what i could not afford... It is the basis of human rights that human have every rights to acquire the necessity that they need in their daily living..

i work hard to get what i want.. And that is what drives me to be successful... I buy things base on my needs and base on my own capacity to acquire them.. I don't need any tom, dick or harry to point me the guidelines on what i can own and what i could not... U have no right to question me... I wasn't spoon fed like you... And i don't just laze around in the house waiting for the world to be better...

Yes... I don't come from a rich family... And yes I'm not married to a rich husband... But do i still have to buy a 10 ringgit shirt when i can afford a 100 ringgit shirt??? I know where i came from... It made me what i am today... And yes i still remember the years when i own only a pair of cargo pants and 3 shirt of rm 10 each.. Do i resent it??? No... I don't.. And yes i still wear cheap clothes that i bought at a bundle shop that cost 4 ringgit each... I'm not gonna tell you which one... U figure out yourself..

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BERSIH!!! BERSIH!!! BERSIH????

I have always refrain myself from posting any political views on the blog as i have a strong perception of everyone is entitle to their own perception and interpretation of an ideology...
Is BERSIH an ideology?? In some form we can call it an ideology as it is quite unattainable in the near future...
I have always been politically neutral to the extend people percieve me as apolitical... How can a political science student be apolitical just because she refrain herself from joining any political party... I belive political parties are friends with benefits... We joined a political party that caters to our interest rather than keeping into mind the common interest it uphold.. Thus, i prefer to keep my friend with benefit confidential...
Where was i???? Right.. BERSIH... I understand that this certain group call for a transparency and all those democratic crap (excuse my language) in the next general election.. There are two points why i do not agree with the sitiuation..
Firstly the rally has become a hindrance to the people of malaysia when the enforcement decided control the crowd by preventing any1 from entering KL.. This cause a massive jams which is frustrating!!!
Secondly when it comes to mass gathering, one has to bear in mind that there is no such thing as crowd control... The sentiment of of the masses is like a cahin reaction whereby a person starts shouting and others will follow.. They are easily agitated by the rally speech and action of other members... And this theory have been proven by sociologist ( i learned them in my sociology of political behaviour).... And this leaves me with a less desireable outlook on BERSIH.
In order to make things worse, the UMNO YOUTH and PERKASA have decided to hop on the bandwagon but instead of rallying they are condeming and call for a confrantation... Now instead of the walk of democracy, it has become the walk of politics and has been highly politacise by the media...
So due to this unruly educated man and women, the citizen of Malaysia has been put into a situation that is very similiar to a Darurat... But they call it lockdown...
I'm to sleepy to continue.... Damn!!!

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BERSIH!!! BERSIH!!! BERSIH????

I have always refrain myself from posting any political views on the blog as i have a strong perception of everyone is entitle to their own perception and interpretation of an ideology...
Is BERSIH an ideology?? In some form we can call it an ideology as it is quite unattainable in the near future...
I have always been politically neutral to the extend people percieve me as apolitical... How can a political science student be apolitical just because she refrain herself from joining any political party... I belive political parties are friends with benefits... We joined a political party that caters to our interest rather than keeping into mind the common interest it uphold.. Thus, i prefer to keep my friend with benefit confidential...
Where was i???? Right.. BERSIH... I understand that this certain group call for a transparency and all those democratic crap (excuse my language) in the next general election.. There are two points why i do not agree with the sitiuation..
Firstly the rally has become a hindrance to the people of malaysia when the enforcement decided control the crowd by preventing any1 from entering KL.. This cause a massive jams which is frustrating!!!
Secondly when it comes to mass gathering, one has to bear in mind that there is no such thing as crowd control... The sentiment of of the masses is like a cahin reaction whereby a person starts shouting and others will follow.. They are easily agitated by the rally speech and action of other members... And this theory have been proven by sociologist ( i learned them in my sociology of political behaviour).... And this leaves me with a less desireable outlook on BERSIH.
In order to make things worse, the UMNO YOUTH and PERKASA have decided to hop on the bandwagon but instead of rallying they are condeming and call for a confrantation... Now instead of the walk of democracy, it has become the walk of politics and has been highly politacise by the media...
So due to this unruly educated man and women, the citizen of Malaysia has been put into a situation that is very similiar to a Darurat... But they call it lockdown...
I'm to sleepy to continue.... Damn!!!

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The bus ride...

Let us say... That i hate bus ride... Since like 4ever... And here i'm stuck in these bloody jam and thank 4 the seat... And what does urs trully do on this foresaken bus ride??? I blog.... I guess this will be the only time that i can have a time to myself... Even thou its crowded and smelly... I have to endure it.. As it is the cheapest way to get home... Life is interesting.. Observing my fellow passenger.. One come in2 conclusion that 60 % are and the 40% are malaysian... I realize that most of the 60% DRESS just like klians... Gone were the the synonemous dress code that m'sian tend to label them with... I'm writing this in a general manner as there is some prying on my writing...... With all this multi tasking and writing.. I have only cover 40% of my first bus ride home... Sigh!!!!? blasted jam!!!! Am gonna try to capture the moment..

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An Ounce of Hope and a Bucket Full of Prayer

After being stuck in a rut for two month jobless, I’m finally back on track. It was early this month I manage to land one of my biggest breaks for the year 2011. I manage to snag my dream job :) (ps: those who knew me well will have the idea of where I’m currently working).

Currently I’m very contented with my post at the United Nation University as a Human Resource Junior Assistant. My colleagues are the best as they made me feel extremely welcome on my first week of duty.

I have been very passionate in working with the UN for a very long time… here is how it all began….

My father introduces me into the world of UN when during my childhood years. As a child, I find that the best time to spent with my father was during the RTM “Dunia Jam 10”. The reason to this being was that I have a crush on the news anchorman (the Singh guy with a manly voice) and secondly was to question my father the things I heard and the images I saw on the screen…

One night, I heard the word PBB- Persatuan Bangsa-Bangsa Bersatu. I then enquire my dad on the matter it was then he told what UN was and how its charter constitute of Human Rights, Peace Keeping and even equal rights. It was then that I have decided to work with the UN.

My dream at one point became unattainable. Yet I hold on to that ounce of dream in my heart and prayed for a miracle. With the help of my love one prayer I managed to turn my dream into a realization. This is a reminder to myself that whatever the obstacle I might face in years to come, I should hold on to my ounce of hope and seek the help from Allah with a bucket full of prayer I can and will overcome it 



to those who think i'm in my own make belief world.. you know who you are



30 days challenge~ Day 2 : A photo of something you eat today and the meaning behind your name

A photo of something you eat today

 it was a dark and windy afternoon today.. so i decided to cheer up myself with a slab of kak taty's scrumptious chocolate cake :) and two cup of javva just for kicks :)

IT WAS THE BEST... NOW I'M SALIVATING OVER A PICTURE OF MEE REBUS :p

the meaning behind your name

NUR HASANAH =THE LIGHT OF GOODNESS :)

my name is a good reminder  from both of my parents that they i hope that as i grow up, i'll be a good muslim.... Oma..Appa Kamsahamnida :) 

a 3 year old blog post..

 I realize that this days, kids have become technology savvy. Aishah a 3 year old have been obsess with watching Barbie on my phone via phone... she can watch them for 15 minutes non stop... so as i was surfing the net, i got a notification on my e-mail saying that i have update my blog through my phone... which is with aishah...

so this is her 1st blog post 

and this is how she act when she was caught in the act....

1st the guilty face...

then somehow they decide to strike a pose... sigh!!!!

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Letter to a lizard

can anyone spot the lizard???

Dear lizard/gecko or whatever name the worlds call u... I would be pleased and relief if u were to leave me alone for the rest of my life... Our first encounter was when i was 9 when u crawled on my bed and up u when to shake hands with me... Ur slimey and goey like body gives me goosebumps and shivers run down my spine the moment we touch... It was just yuck... Latter in life just the glimpse had me running... I was thankful at the thought u might not approach me again.. But i was wrong... When o reach the age 18, u decided to say hello that was when i found u crawling up my neck... I then thought that was the end of our relationship... But no... U had to try for the 3rd time... That was when i caught u in my shoes just a little to late... After u wriggle at my toe so i decided that the 3rd time is a strike...

After all the bad xperiance i had with u... I decided that i would rather stay away from you that making u my fren... I know Allah create u for a reason and even thou u betray the prophet... I don't find it in me to kill u.. All i did was to repel you from my sanctuary... So u must imagine my suprise when i found u there stuck at that spot... Like its ur sanctuary... For the last time.. Liazard i was never glad to make ur  acquaintance and i never will... So will u please get the hell out from my sanctuary so i can live in peace??


Urs unfaithfully
Hasanah a.akhir


Ps: u wouldn't one me to use a restraining order now would u...

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30 days challenge~ Day 1 : A photo description of yourself and how your days was including 5 interesting facts about urself

Day 1.a : A PHOTO OF URSELF AND HOW UR DAY WAS 

when i was cute and still adorable :)

Well today was the day i did some spring cleaning in my old room... being married, my room has been pass over to my elder brother. With this, i have to packed my belongings and bring the over to MIL house.. After going through most of the stuff that i own- i kept my own lock of hair when i was 8 (a princess phase). i guess this has to be my fav growing up pictures.. somehow i manage to look adorable.

Day 1.b: 5 interesting facts about urself

1. I never want to be rich- 
      to me a sufficient amount of money for me and my family to   
      get by is all i ever wanted. Material/brands never bother me much but i hate it when i could 
      never buy a good book because i'm slightly off budget. 


2. I hate creepy crawlies and love anything crafty


3. I want to be the UN secretary general, writer, historian and 
    archiologist
     (those are my life longs dream and it can be proved as a valid reason why i do 
      not want to be rich and glamorous).

4. People assume that i'm "open-minded" but actually i'm a little bit  
    conservative 
      ( in a sense that i hold on to old age tradition as long as it is within the boundaries of Islam.... 
       somehow i love the stereotypical role of a women but it doesn't mean i can be stepped upon)


5. I'm shy but talkative
     when being in an unfamiliar grounds i tend to be a shy wallpaper but once the adaptation occur--  
      - i'm a happy little chatterbox that could go on forever.

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